This also includes inclusion in the schedule. “Planning sex can be better for your sex life than it sounds,” said Dr. Chavez. “People fear that it will take away the excitement, but if anything, it will increase the anticipation through planning and not be rushed or put on hold.”
Why not aim for sex once a week? This is not only an achievable goal, but according to a study with over 25,000 adults it is actually optimal. A 2016 study published in the journal Social Psychology and Personality Science found that weekly sex is ideal for maximum wellbeing. When respondents between the ages of 18 and 89 had more than that, their self-reported happiness actually flattened out – and that finding was true for both men and women and was consistent no matter how long they were together.
Go to a party.
While we’ve seen many of our partners over the past year, according to Kendra Knight, Assistant Professor of Communication Studies at DePaul University, there has been a lack of social gatherings where you see your partner through the eyes of others. She said seeing your significant other at an event – in disguise, maybe funny – can renew your own attraction.
Our assessment of our partner’s attractiveness, sometimes referred to as “partner value,” is in part a function of other people’s ratings. That can, said Dr. Knight, from physical attractiveness to social attractiveness (if they are the life of the party, for example) to so-called “task attractiveness” – for example, making a lot of their famous margaritas or crushing a backyard horseshoe game.
Of course, if you or your buddy aren’t ready for big events or didn’t really like neighborhood block parties at all, you could just snap photos with close friends or family for dinner. Each of us has our own comfort levels when it comes to going into the big wide world after so much isolation. “Check out each other regularly and let us know how you feel when you get out,” said Dr. Awosan. “And work to be kind and patient wherever your partner is.”
Rediscover your playful side.
The last year and a half have been difficult. Now that we’re heading for a summer with far fewer restrictions than last, it’s okay to think about bringing back some ease. A more playful relationship can revive this sparkle, according to an assessment by the Martin Luther University Halle-Wittenberg in Germany.
The study’s lead author, Kay Brauer, a researcher in the Psychology Department, found that people who did well in “other playfulness” or fooling around with others “could be especially important to maintaining relationships after long periods of monotony the time to revive quarantine. “